The fly on the wall - aka the Facebook Dilemma

The nest emptied years ago when I was the last of three to leave. In 2000, I finally moved out of my parents house and got my first job out of college. I lived there for only a semester post graduation, but when I moved out, I still came home to do my laundry even though it was a 3 hour drive. Since moving further away (12 hours by car), I've had to find other places to launder my clothes as well as other ways to keep in touch besides weekend road trips home. Email and instant messenger were all the rage and occasionally I'd pick up the phone, but had to make sure I wasn't calling when the Red Wings were playing or I wouldn't be able to talk to my father until intermission.

Not only are "kids these days" staying connected via Facebook, but so are people who weren't born in the 80s, namely those born between 1940-1968 - parents. Okay, okay, so my year range might be off, but you get the point. Call it spying, call it keeping track of, call it what you want, but parents are able to monitor their kids whereabouts, friends, contacts, pictures, posts, and just their kids being kids without even talking with them. Ah - the power of technology! The ability to stay connected with as little interaction as possible!

This is, however, if the child confirms their parent as a "friend".

This is my dilemma.

My mother, who still writes checks to pay for groceries, who didn't get a cordless phone until about 10 years ago, and who didn't get a cell phone until about 3 years ago (fear of brain cancer and 'what to do with it'), has discovered Facebook. And now, I am getting knots in my stomach with the decision of 'do I, or don't I' when it comes to adding her as a friend. A Friend Request has already been sent, but I'm avoiding making eye contact with the notification as I would with a Pop-tart in a vending machine during my period.

Even though I'm in my 30s, I feel like there are things I do or say that I don't want my parents to know about. I think it started as a child when I climbed on top of my elementary school and my mom somehow found out. No one I knew, or who was with me, told her, but she found out. She had her "spies" around town. Sure, I could filter what I say and post, but I think my friends can relate more when my status is "I still can't turn my head left or right after my rugby match 3 days ago".

No need to make my mom worry from a distance. I can filter things over the phone.